Saturday, March 5, 2011

A Career for Abby

You all know that I'm a frisbee-chasing kind of gal.

Abby, on the other hand, is a bit more of a, ah, sitting-in-the-snow kind of gal. Sure, she likes bitey-face and will occasionally jump for a frisbee, but given her druthers, she'd rather plop herself down in the snow.

Being an ample-bottomed girl, Abby is very suited for sitting in the snow.

And I will be the first to admit that she's Very Good at it.

So, I'm thinking of signing Abby up for the 10th Mountain Division, or some Norwegian elite border patrol or something. Because I could totally see her perched up on a snowy hillside, dug into the snow, prepared to bark an alert at any intruder.

See, she's almost totally camouflaged here....

And she could sit there for HOURS.

If pressed, she could rouse herself and engage in hand-to-hand combat. (I'd suggest that she be a sniper, but a have feeling that her lack of opposable thumbs could be a bit of a hindrance in sniper training...)

Speaking of hand-to-hand combat, my darling, lard-butted sister gave me a smackdown yesterday. What is up with that?!?

All I can say is that I'm not going to take this lying down, even if Lard Butt out-weighs me by about 500 lbs.

I'm definitely going to give her an earful.


And I'm going to start searching the internet for military organizations that could find a place for fat-bottomed girls who like to sit in the snow for hours on end. Maybe Finland still needs their eastern border patrolled? According to Wikipedia (the font of all knowledge and wisdom in the universe...), the majority of Finnish soldiers are trained in ski combat, and skiing is a part of standard required training for all conscripts. I think Abby would be perfect for them. Heck, they might even bring her on as a trainer.

Look at that skill!


Eh. I might miss her. A little bit.

Or maybe not....


*kissey face*
-Fiona and Abby the-soon-to-be-speaking-Finnish Hippobottomus


House of Carnivores said...

Aww, of course you would miss her!

It looks like they're having a great time in the snow!

Frankie Furter said...

That Smack Down was Painful to see.
I am sure it was caused by her hearing you call her Lard-Butt. I'm just sayin.

Ettel, Charlie Poodle, and Emma Pitty said...

Haha. Fiona, I think it's one of those things where you're supposed to "let sleeping dogs lie" - even if they're in the snow! But mountain patrol sounds like an awesome job!!

Benny and Lily said...

Oh yes sign her up. Its funny she likes laying in the snow.
Benny & Lily

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

Being a Snow Sentry is a FURRY important job!

Take it from ME!

Of khourse, I'm lakhking snow right now so I'm a Grass Guardian -


bermudabluez said...

You would SO miss her Fiona!!! We just know it!!! You two have WAY more fun than you all by yourself!!! Love all these shots....and Abby really IS cute even though she sits in the snow!! xoxox Chloe and LadyBug

Lorenza said...

I know you would miss her a lot! I know!
Looking at you two with all that snow in your fur.... brrrrrr!
Happy Sunday!
Kisses and hugs

Charlie said...

You would definitely miss her. You know you would!
- Charlie

Wild Dingo said...

In that first photo, it looks like that lard butt has a bit of MUSCLE there launching her attack.

Fat-bottom Girls? Now the song is in my head...

so i think woo need to put your bottoms up online for comparison and have that song in the background. let the readers decide if she's really a Fat-bottom girl!


Mango said...

I believe that you have found the perfect career for Abby and I wish her luck in her ventures. Sure, she can come home and visit sometimes, but a bit of peace for yourself would be nice too.


Minna Krebs said...

Don't her Bottom ever freeze, sitting in da snow fur so long?!?!?!? Amazing.

PeeS.....and I bet you would miss her!!!

Amber-Mae said...

Don't you ever get frozen after a while, sitting & lying down on that freezing snow? As usual, love your pictures!

Anonymous said...

I concur with Mango. Hurry, before her bottom gets any bigger.

Honey the Great Dane said...

Gosh, Abby must have a bottom like one of those special car machine seats which heats up! I don't know how she could just lay there like that in the snow!

LOVE the smackdown photos!

Honey the Great Dane

Shannon @ Why Not On A Tuesday said...

Fiona, you are too funny! Leave your sister alone! Nothing's wrong with a little junk in the trunk!

Kari in WeHo said...

my three would much rather play fetch than lay in the snow!


Heather and Pumpkin said...

I am freezing just looking at those photos!