Me Thinks Something is Rotten, and I Don't Think It Is The Trash (for once)

I must act fast, or I shall find that I have become Mango. No, not in a relentlessly huge, goobery, languorous, torpid, but magnificently so sort of way, but in a my-bloggie-is-being-taken-over-by-my-younger-sibling sort of way. Yesterday’s post? Who let the little rat near the computer? Not me, I tell you. Sure, when she gets old enough to have something worth saying, I might give her the opportunity to dip her unnaturally large toe in the water, but until then, nope. Look at poor Mango; master of his domain, until he put forth enormous effort to make the 2010 MangoMinster the raging success that it was, and he comes back to discover that his little brother has usurped his bloggie, and he’s stuck with unflattering picture of himself being posted, and has to suffer the indignity of the name of his bloggie being changed to "Mango and Dexter's Great Adventures". Poor guy! . This borders on the level of political upheaval in a banana republic (and I’m not talking about a store full of over-priced clothes for people who want to look like they have slightly more money that then people who shop at The Gap).

And I, for one, will not stand for it in Fionaland. Okay, technically it is TaiChiLand, but she has relinquished most of her power and public appearances in order than she may seek a More Perfect Nap. When it comes down to it, though, she still makes the important decisions, the red telephone rings directly through to her, and it is her voice alone that allows access to the nuclear arsenal launch codes.

*Betcha you didn’t think we had a nuclear arsenal, did you? Yeah well, this is Utah, and you can own pretty much any weapon in production, as long as you don’t point it directly at your neighbor’s living room window.*

*ahem*

I will quash any uprisings with impunity.


I’m just saying.


And Farley? I love you dearly, but your stated affections for the Little Monster my dear sister border on treason. I’m just saying. ;-) I know that it is easy to get suckered in by those Cute Puppy Pictures, but trust me, underneath that fuzzy exterior beats the heart of a monster. So don’t let down your guard!

Gah. Someone seems to keep hacking into my site and posting pictures of the Demon Spawn.

Besides, the Little Beast can’t even get up on the bed on her own without a child step.


And she hides under the bed to get away from the Jaws of Doom. Hee-hee.

Until she can get up on the bed by herself, and she out-weighs me, she won’t have anything to say. Trust me.

Even if I have to sit on her. Because we in Fionaland do not believe in "freedom of the press" (unless it is my freedom to press Abby into the mud/snowbank)....


And now that I have made that clear, we’ll return to our regularly scheduled blogging. Stay tuned!

*kissey face*

-Fiona, Supreme Dictator of Fionaland for Life